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11 reasons why Cavan will always be better than Monaghan

There’s only one winner in this rivalry.

1. First of all, Cavan had its very own beloved soft drink

Does Monaghan have its own mineral? We think not.

2. Cavan is also home to noted gourmand Neven Maguire and his fancy restaurant McNean House & Restaurant

Meanwhile, this is what happens when you look for a fancy restaurant in Monaghan.

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“Do you mean good restaurant?” Monaghan doesn’t even know the meaning of fancy.

3. Cavan is home to The Strypes, while Monaghan is home to… Big Tom

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4. Patrick Kavanagh never wrote a poem about how grim Cavan is

Meanwhile, he accused Monaghan’s stony grey soil of burgling his bank of youth and thieving the laugh from his love.

Cavan would have never burgled Kavanagh’s bank of youth. Cavan’s not like that.

5. Did we mention Cavan is home to acclaimed singer-songwriters Aine Cahill and Lisa O’Neill while Monaghan is home to… yep, Big Tom

Big Tom is a national treasure and all, but you know.

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6. Cavan have won five All-Irelands

How many have Monaghan won? Oh yeah, that’s right — a bit fat ZERO.

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7. Cavan are also the only team in Ireland to have ever won an All-Ireland outside of Ireland

What were you doing in 1947, Monaghan? We’ll tell you what you were doing — not winning the All-Ireland in New York.

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8. Cavan has the more badass GAA nickname, too

Who do you fear more?

The Breffni Men…

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Or the frankly ridiculous-sounding Farney Army?

9. Cavan is also home to some of the country’s greatest dancers.

For example, this young lad.

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Would you ever get that in Monaghan? We think not.

10. The library in Cavan is so glam that Mr. Big from Sex and the City goes there

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Meanwhile in Monaghan Town Library…

11. In short, Monaghan will never beat Cavan

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