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Dublin: 17 °C Saturday 23 June, 2018
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8 things Dublin rental ads say... and what they really mean

Oh, the joys.

1. What they say: “Modern studio apartment!”

met Source: Flickr

What they really mean: Ever find yourself chillaxing in your sitting room and thinking, “Ugh, I wish this place had a fridge, toilet and bed!” Well, you’re in luck.

2. What they say: “Located 10 minutes from Dublin City Centre”

dcc Source: Flickr

What they really mean: Located 10 minutes from Dublin City Centre *if* you are an Olympic gold medal-winning speed walker and/or own a jetpack.

3. What they say: “Spacious double room!”

CgrXDxFXEAMYSoz Source: Euan W/Twitter

What they really mean: A spacious double room if you’re a toddler with no belongings, that is. Did we neglect to mention that? Our bad.

4. What they say: “All modcons included.”

mach Source: Flickr

What they really mean: Actually, there’s a pay-as-you-go electricity meter, storage heating that we’ll pretend works out cheaper in the long run and a washing machine from 2001 that you share with eight other people.

5. What they say: “Beautifully maintained period building!”

period Source: Flickr

What they really mean: We haven’t changed the wallpaper or carpet since the 1970s.

6. What they say: “SUITABLE FOR ONE PERSON ONLY”

daft Source: Daft

What they really mean: Look, we’re really chancing our arm with this one. It’s barely suitable for a cat.

7. What they say: “References required”

na Source: Flickr

What they really mean: Your last eighteen payslips, the deeds to your father’s land, all your primary school reports, a recommendation signed by Michael D. Higgins, a baby deer’s eyelash and a vial of your blood required.

8. What they say: “Viewings on July 4th!”

house Source: Flickr

What they really mean: 32 people will be queuing up outside this house on July 4th with references and their life savings in tow. You probably will not get it in the end and will curse yourself for taking the time off work to come. Best of luck!

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About the author:

Amy O'Connor

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