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Dublin: 6 °C Friday 29 March, 2024
FIFA

11 ways you know you're a FIFA widow(er)

It never ends.

THE NEW FIFA 16 was released last week and all FIFA fans are getting bet into it. But what happens when you can’t stand the sight of the game, but your other half can think about? Welcome to FIFA widow(er)hood.

Yes, we’ve made that a thing.

1. This is your view

From day.

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To night.

CPnydshWEAA_qza narwayns narwayns

2. You have to deal with them shouting at literally nothing

It’s SO UNFAIR, yet they keep going back for more.

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3. Life is now soundtracked by the electronic cheers of an electronic crowd

What does silence sound like? You can’t remember.
https://vine.co/v/bJm2IdAQXAx

4. You’re mildly baffled at how the commentator knows what’s going on

HOW DO THEY KNOW WHAT’S HAPPENING?

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5. When you think you’ve left the house and are on safe ground, out comes the app

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6. WHAT. A. GOAL.

Familiarise yourself with this phrase. You’ll be hearing it a lot.

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7. Your plans and life now consists of segments

Communication will now take place at times known as ‘half’ and ‘full’.

This is a card you would love to receive over anything:

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Usually you just get this text instead:

CLmu8dmUcAAQjJ3 livvvhow livvvhow

8. You feel a strange sense of rivalry with EA sports

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9. And you know they’re winning

CPiKEADWcAApgLW hellokimmm hellokimmm

10. If you do actually play, and beat them, expect a bad mood incoming

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11. Getting the TV is almost an unachievable goal

Godspeed ye, all abandoned at the hand of football games.

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