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16 things that would happen if Gilmore Girls was set in Dublin

Where you lead, I will folley…

First published January 2016

gg RollingNews.ie RollingNews.ie

1. Mary Black would sing A Woman’s Heart as the theme song

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2. Stoneybatter would take the place of Stars Hollow and members of Delorentos and Villagers would show up on random street corners singing songs

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3. Lorelai would find out she was pregnant in the toilets of the Kylemore Cafe, using a pregnancy test bought in Sam McCauleys

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4. Her friends would slag her about Spanish sailors and write ‘A1 Sharon’ on her copy of Soundings

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5. Calling her baby girl ‘Rory’ for short would cause untold confusion for Rory’s entire life

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6. Luke would manage an Eddie Rockets and regularly hop teenagers out of it for taking the piss and sharing one Oreo milkshake

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7. Lorelai and Rory would inexplicably live in a huge fancy house on the nice bit of the North Circular Road, despite having no money

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8. Rory’s Foxrock Granny would send her to Alexandra College, where she’d found a school newspaper and write an exposé on the scandal behind the ever rising price of Freddo Bars in the tuck shop

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9. Rory would really want to go to UCD but her grandparents would be sneaking into her room to change her CAO first preference to Trinners

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10. Domhnall Gleeson would play Rory’s first boyfriend, work in Super Valu, and wear bootcut jeans

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11. Colin Farrell would play Rory’s rebellious second boyfriend, slip the fact that he’s from the ‘Knock into every second sentence, and never fail at buying naggins underage from the offie

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12. Lane would sneak off to Electric Picnic for the weekend, after telling her mam she was going on a training course to be a Eucharistic minister at mass

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13. Town Hall meetings would revolve around bin collections, fighting over who should lead the Tidy Towns committee, and when the 24 hour Irish dancing marathon should take place

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14. Suki’s greatest enemy would be Rachel Allen, and she would hiss at the telly everytime Allen was on talking about ‘buttah’

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15. Lorelai would mortify Rory by showing up to her debs with one of the teachers, and be caught shifting him in the jacks

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16. Rory would end up going to Trinners, get schols, and fall for the heir to the Indo

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It’s official: Gilmore Girls is coming back on Netflix

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