THERE HAS BEEN further misfortune for Kate Middleton this week, with the news that her baby bump is getting an unexpected outing in an Italian weekly magazine.
So you probably have some BIG questions about the progress of the Royal Pregnancy, right?
No? Well, tough. The media has answered them for you anyway:
1. So, how long to go now?
2. And when’s the official belly-unveiling?
3. Hang on – how does Keira Knightley feel about all this?
4. What’s the grandmother-in-law’s stance on where the baby should be born?
5. Wait, how big is this thing again?
6. And this sweet potato – is it rich?
7. Would you say that Kate Middleton and Kim Kardashian are locked in a contest to gestate a human being in their bodies before some unspoken deadline?
8. Let’s look to the future. What behavioural traits can we expect in 13-18 years’ time?
Kate Middleton, being presented with flowers by a grateful journalist (probably) (Nick Ansell/PA Wire/Press Association Images)
9. What about that tennis thingy?
10. Wow, there’s a lot going on. Is there anything else William and Kate should be worrying about?