1. Saying “Excuse me!” or “Sorry!” to inanimate objects
It’s not your fault shop mannequins these days look like actual people!
2. Ditto when other people bump into you
They barge on without a word, unaware of you mentally scolding yourself for doing it AGAIN.
3. Overusing the phrase “If it isn’t any trouble”
Like everything is a massive favour.
4. And panicking when you actually have to ask a favour
You immediately turn into Hugh Grant in a particularly woeful romantic comedy.
“Sorry, I was just wondering if you might possibly… If it’s OK with you, if you could just…”
5. Letting cold calls go on for FAR too long
It feels rude to interrupt. But you do have things to do. Is now a good time to cut across? *worries for eternity*
6. Rarely correcting people who get your name wrong
“And how long have you been in Dublin, Veronica?” No one say anything. SHH. Veronica is my name now. Forever.
7. Agonising over sending food back
You don’t want to eat lukewarm pasta, but goddamn it if you hate making a ‘scene’.
8. And telling the hairdresser that they made a hames of your hair
“I’ll get you a mirror so you can see it from the back.”
“*chokes* Ah, it’s lovely, thanks!”
9. Worrying about saying no to something
What if you’re putting them out by saying no? You wouldn’t want to put them out, like.
10. Spending hours* holding a door open for someone a good distance away
*Not really hours, but they may as well be.
11. Never letting a sneeze go unblessed
https://vine.co/v/hVVap7prKjY
You’ve been known to utter a “Bless me!” on occasion if no one offers one to you.
12. And having your rage be twice as effective, when you actually unleash it
Because you’re so afraid of scenes, when you actually cause one, people are SCARED.
