LADS, SOMEONE IN Ireland won €88 million in last night’s Euromillions draw.
This is serious.
1. When are we getting that island?
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2. We’re waiting for it like
3. *suspicious eyes*
4. The country collectively lost the run of itself at approximately 9.40pm last night
5. Sure in this climate, does it matter if you really won or not?
6. Not all of us are taking the loss well
7. At all…
8. Sure look, at least we know what the gossip will be this morning
9. “F**k off now, National Lottery”
We don’t need your pity at a time like this.
10. A satisfying card to send
11. Live shots of you checking your ticket
12. We must be vigilant
13. Even if you didn’t buy a ticket, you still feel cheated
IT COULD HAVE BEEN ME!
14. “They probably won’t even enjoy it”
15. Just for a second though… imagine your face
“Good luck to them.”
