WHAT WAS THE reasoning behind these products? Your guess is as good as ours.
1. A walking sleeping bag
Move from tent to tent like the creep you are, all while staying nice and cosy inside your sleeping bag.
2. Butterstick
Knives. Who needs em?
3. Shoe umbrellas
The only thing worse than soggy socks in the office.
4. Avocado saver
We’re all for the banana saver, but this is just unnecessary and frankly a barrier to avocado consumption.
5. Breast cushion
No, no. This is an actual thing. Do your breasts get in the way of each other while you sleep? One less crippling worry and anxiety for you to ponder over as you lie awake at night.
6. Fish training kit
Is your goldfish useless? Does it just swim around in circles all day, eating specs of fishfood?
Includes a 45 minute detailed instructional DVD featuring world famous fish trainer Dr Dean Pomerleau.
Not Dean Pomerleau?! Take our money.
Your fish will be starting for Man U in no time.
Don’t forget to take them for a walk in this fish walker for sufficient exercise.
7. USB pet rock
Oh yay! What does it do? Well… nothing.
8. Motorised ice-cream cone
Too lazy to make all that effort of twisting the ice cream cone? Well then, this motorised cone may actually be pretty useful to you.
You may also be interested in re-evaluating your life.
9. Screen privacy hat/scarf thing
While they look super stylish, there’s really no need. The NSA get you from the inside.
10. Car desk
For all your ‘commuter’s office’ needs. Is your hazardous driving on your mobile irritating you because the screen just isn’t quite big enough? The solution is finally here.
Not enough room on earth for it? It’s grand, we’ll leave.
The reviews are in, and they’re positive enough.
11. DVD rewinder
Literally a non-thing. There’s absolutely no reason why this needed to be manufactured as a physical object.
12. Tea Nespresso capsules
Y’know what, they’re right. Squeezing a teabag is just way too much muscle strain.
