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heartbreak hotel

10 things absolutely everyone does after a breakup, not just you

All the pizza in bed. All of it.

ALL BY MYYYYSEEEELLLF, don’t wanna live all by myyyyseeelllf, anymooooore…

The stages of a breakup area always the same – people might tell you to get outside and enjoy yourself, but in reality there’s nothing better than a good wallow.

1. Eat absolute sh*te

#pizzainbed #afterwork #besthusbandever Instagram / mminka92 Instagram / mminka92 / mminka92

Pizza in bed! You might get a little garlic dip on the sheet, but who cares, right?

2. Consider writing a drippy Instagram/Facebook post

#lifequotes #lovequotes #happinessquotes #sadquotes #funnyquotes #friendshipquotes #relationshipquotes #breakupquotes #boyfriendquote #girlfriendquote #inspirationalquotes #motivationalquotes #truthquotes #beautifulquotes #celebrityquotes #famousquotes #instadaily #instaquotes #quotestoliveby #quoteoftheday youngand_reckless101 youngand_reckless101

NOW EVERYONE SHALL KNOW YOUR PAIN.

3. Go on one mad sesh that ends in tears*

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*The tears may be literal or figurative.

Your pals will toss a coin to see who has to bring you home, and no one will be happy about it.

4. Wake up from that mad sesh to discover the Inbox of Shame

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And the worst thing is – they haven’t replied. *prays for the sweet release of death*

5. Make a dodgy Spotify playlist filled with ballads

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An eclectic mix of Mariah Carey, Bright Eyes, and Miley Cyrus. Just gonna stick that one on private.

6. Say you’ll “show them”

hardcore BlogSpot BlogSpot

You’re gonna prove to them that you’re over it! (You’re not over it.)

7. Get an ill-advised haircut/start growing a beard

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Look at you. You’re showing them.

8. Block, then unblock, then block your ex again

Report-Hide-Block-Unfriend-Person-From-Facebook Techhelpmadeeasy Techhelpmadeeasy

It just seems so drastic. But essential! But drastic.

9. Interrupt normal conversations with “But can you just BELIEVE that?”

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You can’t stop talking about them for two seconds. Congratulations, you’ve become the worst friend in the world.

10. And finally, get the hell over it

Anchorman Mashable Mashable

*You Can Call Me Al begins to play*

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