IT’S TIME TO turn over a new social media leaf. From now on, we wish to see no more of these things on our precious internet.
1. Sharing these ridiculous Minions memes on Facebook
What are you even on about? How did Minions get involved in this? Leave it out.
You know those Instagram photos shot from above with items like mugs, laptops, notebooks and candles laid out all perfectly?
We know you spent 20 minutes arranging it! You can’t fool us.
3. Tweeting “I wrote a thing”/”I did a thing”
Own your achievements. You’re allowed.
4. Decades-long Snapchat monologues
Snapchat is deeply personal, and that’s part of the fun – but if you need a place to rant for two minutes about the bus journey home, start a vlog channel. Or call a friend.
5. Dot replying on Twitter
Thank you for letting us know that you’re telling Katie Hopkins what’s what. Really. We’re so glad.
6. Using any and all of the following hashtags: #fitfam, #cleaneats, #mealprep, #cheatmeal
There’s a way of writing about your healthy lifestyle in an interesting manner, but this is not it.
7. Calling things ‘cheeky’
How is having a glass of wine cheeky? Who told you not to do it? You’re a fully grown human being in your own home.
8. Asking people to go out and enjoy ‘real life’ instead of looking at their phones
Oh, social media isn’t ‘real life’? DUH. Why do you think we’re on here?
9. Posting pictures of sleeping loved ones
Dogs, OK. Babies, fine. But STOP TAKING PICTURES OF YOUR BOYFRIEND WHILE HE’S ASLEEP. IT’S WEIRD.
10. Auto-tweeting your workouts/follower count
Seriously. It’s almost 2016. It’s time for you and your Twitter settings to have a little chat.