SOME THINGS JUST never change.
And thank God they don’t, because Ireland wouldn’t be the same without them.
1. Being offered a cup of tea
Frankly, if you can’t rely on being offered a cup of tea in Ireland, then what in the world COULD you rely on?
2. The national anthem at last orders
And if it isn’t the anthem, it’s going to be Journey. You could bet the farm on it.
3. Having a relation called Mary
And you’re definitely going to have one called John as well.
4. Rain
Nigh-on guaranteed.
5. Discussion of aforementioned rain
As sure as night follows day.
6. The best Guinness
You can always rely on Ireland to supply you with the best of the black stuff.
7. Having some connection to the person you’ve just been introduced to
Bank on it.
8. Irish dancing medals in every house
We’ve all gone one lurking away in a press somewhere.
9. Discussing directions
Irish people love to tell other Irish people exactly what route they took to get somewhere. It’s almost like swapping war stories.
“You don’t know about the traffic on the N11, man. You weren’t there.”
10. A good, cathartic moan
God love us, we can always be relied upon to tell people how we REALLY feel about any given situation.
11. Ensuing accusations of begrudgery
Accusation of being a “begrudger” are sure to follow any moan. It’s the circle of Irish life.
12. Annoyance at tourists
Especially tourists that claim Irish heritage. Ganging up against tourists is one thing that truly brings the Irish people together.
13. A needle and thread in the biscuit tin
Sure what else’d be in there? Biscuits? Ah go ‘way, there haven’t been biscuits in that tin since 1976.
