WE ALL HAVE these friends in our friend group. If you don’t, it’s you.
1. The childhood friend
You lived beside each other and grew up together, but grew apart at some stage. You’re still good friends though, when you see each other in the pub at Christmas.
2. The best friend
The first person in your friend group you tell the good news to, and the one just click with most. They’re like the sibling you never had.
3. The ACTUAL best friend
You spend the most time with this person and they know everything about you. A bit TOO much. They know you’re weird habits and is possibly closer to your mam than you are, but they don’t have the official title. WHY?
4. The best friend of the opposite sex
Will you? Won’t you? No, you won’t. You often wonder why nothing romantic ever happened, until you realised that it would be like hooking up with your brother or sister. No thanks.
5. The soulmate
This friend just CLICKS. You have the exact same sense of humour, interests, likes, dislikes. Basically, it’s baffling why this casual acquaintance isn’t considered your best friend. No, instead you see them at a club or at the gym every now and again and that’s enough.
6. The bitch
This friend takes the greatest pleasure in bitching about everyone you know when you meet up with them. They bring out your inner bitch too, and you have a sneaky suspicion they talk shite about you behind your back. All worth it for an amazing gossip though, eh?
7. The sesh monster
This friend is just waiting at the end of their phone to reply your request for a session. You know you’ll have a good night out when they’re with you, and you can’t remember the last time you saw them during the daytime.
8. The late one
Everyone has that one friend that you can count on to be late. You can almost guarantee they’ll show up 30 minutes late, so have started lying to them about the time you’ll meet.
9. The flaky one
They are constantly bailing on plans, or finally got a boyfriend or girlfriend and have disappeared off the face of the earth. Oh you’re so happy for them…
10. The shit one
You’re not even sure why you’re friends with this person, they spent most of their life like they’re the villain in the Hills and stirring up shite in WhatsApp groups.
11. The forward friend
You’re not quite sure where this friend came from, but they make damn well sure to stay on your friend radar until the bitter end.
12. The grown up friend
This friend was a bit older than you and someone who did everything before you. They’re kinda like the big brother or sister you never had, but could be utilised for stuff like going to the off-license. Result.
13. The so ahead of you friend
They’ve got their dream job, are engaged to the love of their life, have a mortgage and a nice little house, and they’re ten months younger than you. Please, tell us more about your dream sitch while we worry about affording the next round.
14. The friend abroad
They went off to Australia or Canada and left poor little you at home. They give you cred to start conversations with ‘my friend in Australia said…’ and the vague thought that maybe some day you’ll visit that country and be able to stay with them for free.
