I DROPPED OUT of playschool on my first day.
Why? Well, I was offered a bowl of baked beans for my lunch, and that was that, I vowed never to return.
Backing away from the bowl of beans being kindly proffered, I retreated into the playhouse and refused to come back out.
After picking up the yellow plastic phone mounted to the interior wall of the playhouse, I dialled my home phone number and waited patiently for my mother to answer.
Given the fact that the phone was, you know, a toy, she didn’t pick up and I was made to wait until she arrived to collect me later that afternoon.
I told her in no uncertain terms I wouldn’t be returning on account of the bean issue, and more than 25 years later, the memory is still seared in my mind.
I remember feeling panicked as I was forced to explain that I was afraid of beans, vaguely hysterical as I realised my phone call home was unlikely to connect, and confused as to how everyone else appeared to be having a whale of a time.
In other words, I remember being the weirdo of the group.
These weird moments aren’t unique to anyone, however, and we all have a stash of childhood memories that we aren’t likely to forget any time soon.
Here are just some of the best Twitter has to offer.
1. For the love of God.
I miss 5 yr old me that used to sneak into the fridge to eat butter. She seemed pretty cool #butter #yum #iwasaweirdchild #howamInotfat
— Samantha E. Edwards (@TheBedtimeBard) October 7, 2015
2. This could have gone hideously wrong.
#weirdchildhoodmemory: locking myself in the dryer and falling asleep.
— simranDHANOA (@simdhanoa) October 31, 2011
3. Oh… gorgeous.
I used to chew on the wax paper that came with muffins. #IwasAweirdChild
— Psycho Lo$er (@tseringbui) August 24, 2014
4. Pure notions.
When I was little I wouldn't eat grapes unless I peeled them . #IWasAWeirdChild
— Manda (@maandaa_b) November 4, 2014
5. If only.
As a kid I would go to a mall and pretend that everything I touched I would get free and in my size.😁 #what #iwasaweirdchild #stillam
— Gabrielle (@gabriellealyse4) July 17, 2013
6. We mean, maybe he was?
I was convinced Tupac was my real dad when I was little... #funfact #iwasaweirdchild 😏😂
— Kalinda Fooks (@Kbabyy13) March 16, 2013
7. OK, wow.
#WhenIWasLittle i thought i was a dog and went to the bathroom in the yard instead of a toliet #iwasaweirdchild
— Brittany Roy (@BrittanyRoy16) December 29, 2012
8. Alright, so.
#WhenIWasYounger I pretended I was from America and that I had Tourette's #IWasAWeirdChild
— Natalie Rollinson (@TillyRx) August 15, 2012
9. Then there’s this.
At Mother's Day brunch: "When you were 3, every time we passed a cemetery, you'd lick ur lips and say 'mmmm dead bodies'" #iwasaweirdkid
— Mary Emily O’Hara (@MaryEmilyOHara) May 14, 2017
10. Alright, so.
Remembering the days when I'd go to the playground, speak with a British accent & tell the other kids I was from London #iwasaweirdkid
— Allison MacDougall (@allisonmacd) October 13, 2015
11. Was this really necessary?
#WeirdChildhoodMemory whenever i got in trouble, i'd write on my knee with a pen "ME BAD" lol
— Vanessa Rivera (@VanessaMessaa) March 19, 2013
12. Dream big.
When I was younger, instead of wishing Justin Bieber was my boyfriend I wished I was his manager #iwasaweirdkid
— kathryn (@so_kathryn) December 28, 2016
13. So wait, she used to change her own nappy?
I knew how to use the toilet I just always liked my diaper, lmaoo. I'd always change myself too. hahhaha #iwasaweirdkid
— Melanie Saylor (@melaniesay_) July 9, 2011
14. We mean, fair enough.
Searching through my mom's hair while she was napping to see if she really had eyes in back of her head
— Cheryl Rick Klein (@cherylt2000) January 4, 2018
#WeirdestChildhoodMemory
15. Right you be, so.
#WeirdestChildhoodMemory I thought camera film looked interesting so I ate some
— queenbilliebuzz (@queF9HPSEkK7e9b) January 5, 2018
