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Dublin: 6 °C Thursday 28 March, 2024
more money than cents

Here's why it's about bloody time 1c and 2c coins were scrapped

End this tyranny.

TODAY’S IRISH INDEPENDENT reports that plans to take 1c and 2c coins out of circulation will go to cabinet tomorrow.

The news comes after a pilot programme in Wexford was deemed a success, so now it looks like the rest of the country could soon be following suit.

And it’s about bloody time.

Here’s why.

There is nothing in this world more awkward than waiting for 1c change

Cashiers give you filthies if you try pay for anything with them

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“Sorry about this,” you say as you count out 30c in 2c coins. “It’s fine,” they say through gritted teeth.

Counting them requires patience that you simply don’t have

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Even if you somehow had €150 in 1c and 2c coins, you would never know because you can’t be arsed counting them and sorting them into coin bags.

In fairness, would you be well?

They somehow end up everywhere

 

On the floor, in couch crevices, in your goddamned shoes — they somehow manage to end up absolutely everywhere.

And nobody wants them. Not even Luas machines.

90282626 Sam Boal / Photocall Ireland Sam Boal / Photocall Ireland / Photocall Ireland

And so you have to save up until you can get rid of them in a self-service checkout.

Even then you have to do it when nobody else is around, so nobody sees you dumping a war chest of 1c coins just to pay for bread, milk and hummus.

The struggle is real.

They make your wallet feel deceptively full/heavy

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Your wallet weighs as much as a brick and yet you only have €1.47 to your name. But how? The tyranny of 1c coins, that’s how.

You feel stingy if you offload them on charities or in the collection at Mass

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I’M NOT A CHEAPSKATE, I SWEAR.

And it’s not even like you can fob them off on children anymore

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After all, it’s not like you can buy apple drops with a few coppers anymore.

God be with the days, etc.

You don’t even care about hoovering them up

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“Ah well,” you say as you hear your hoover jingle.

Let us reiterate: you don’t even care about hoovering up money.

This is how useless they are!

TL;DR — they’re nothing but a nuisance

Good riddance.

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