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rob delaney / TwitterIt's crazy to think that something as wonderful as sex can lead to something as terrible as a child.
— rob delaney (@robdelaney) June 1, 2010
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Mary Charlene / Twitterthe last time I attempted one of Cosmo's sex positions, I killed a man
— Mary Charlene (@IamEnidColeslaw) February 5, 2015
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♡ Good Account ♡ / TwitterBoy do I love sex. Really love putting my penis into some *looks at smudged writing on hand* verguba
— Alpha Male (real) (@SortaBad) August 5, 2014
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ONE OF THE GOOD ONES / TwitterAge 10: Sex is gross.
— Enrique Shockwave (@UNDEADTRESOR) March 9, 2015
Age 18: I will literally fuck a live electrical socket.
Age 36: Sex is gross.
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Harris Wittels / TwitterI'm not into casual sex. I am, however, into dressy casual sex. Loafers on, y'all. With whom-the fuck-ever.
— Harris Wittels (@twittels) October 12, 2011
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James Martin / TwitterMy girlfriend says she prefers shoes to oral sex. But I'm head over heels.
— Pundamentalism (@Pundamentalism) October 25, 2013
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Noodles / Twitter[gets exhausted after having sex for five minutes] "Go on without me"
— Noodles (@Dawn_M_) July 25, 2015