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Dublin: 5 °C Sunday 25 February, 2018
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The reality of Valentine's Day when you're in a long-term relationship

Wanna skip it this year?

IF LAST FRIDAY night’s Late Late Show taught us anything, it’s that Valentine’s Day is on the horizon, and road frontage isn’t actually that vital when it comes to getting the shift.

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Good to know.

It also reminded us that we Irish are pretty divided on February 14, with some going all out and others opting to stay in; very, very in.

And it’s likely that if you’re in a long-term relationship, you fall into the latter camp.

Sure, you’ll still mark it – albeit with a vague sense of duty – but you’ll find yourself happening upon the same instances, year in and year out.

1. You won’t know how be original in your card.

We’d hazard a guess that you’ve written the same thing in every card for the last five years. We mean, how can you be expected to come up with something original every damn time?

Between Christmas and birthdays, you’re fresh out of greetings by the time February rolls around, and you’re steps away from writing a reminder to get binliners because at least they’re forced to read it.

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2. You won’t want to go to dinner on the actual day.

In the first flush of love, the pair of you were only dying to secure a table in your favourite restaurant on the big night.

But these days, you’d rather boke than scramble for a reservation when you can eat there every other night of the year without hassle.

You guys celebrate Valentine’s Day around the 25th, because no one tells you two what to do.

3. You will try DIY gifts at least once.

Over the course of your relationship, it’s very likely you’ve opted for the DIY route, and done your level best to make your other half something that’s actually identifiable.

Cut to a panicked moment in an overcrowded Boots when the photo machine won’t work, and you can’t find a 5×7 frame for love nor money.

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4. You will choose munch over presents.

And then there have been the times when you’ve decided against presents entirely.

And what have you done instead?

You’ve opted to pool your money, pay a visit to the petrol station and get fat together, that’s what.

5. You feel weirdly coy about loved-up greetings.

Let’s be honest. writing something sentimental in a card for a person you’ve just b*llocked is a bit of a mind-melt.

And getting romantic when you’re still fuming over the hack of the bathroom is just not  happening.

6. You will judge people who post Valentine’s Day messages on social media.

But to be fair, long-term relationship or not, everyone judges people who post Valentine’s messages on social media.

What? Have they not given you their number yet?

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