THIS AFTERNOON, THE World Economic Forum shared a graphic listing things successful people do before breakfast.
As you can see, these things include working on passion projects, meditating, connecting with your spouse, exercising and networking over coffee.
Clearly successful people have a good seven hours to play with before breakfast, but us normal people? Our mornings go a little something like this…
1. Wake up with a start and wonder where you are, what day it is and whether you’re late
2. Marvel at how dry your mouth is
3. Lie in bed listening to Morning Ireland while calculating the absolute latest time you can get up
“If I get up at 7.37am, I’ll be grand.”
4. “Connect” with your spouse by basically saying nothing to them except for “Excuse me” when you cross paths with them in the hallway
5. Sit on the toilet and contemplate life for a while
6. Check Facebook hoping you’ve gotten a notification in the, oh, seven hours since you last checked it
7. Accidentally spend 7 minutes scrolling mindlessly through Twitter
8. Jump into the shower and remember that you forgot to buy conditioner again; come to terms with the fact that your hair will look a bit of a state today
9. Frantically get dressed and make split second judgements about whether something needs to be ironed or not
“That’s grand*.”
* = could definitely do with an iron, but as if you’re going to go to the trouble of that.
10. Spend several minutes just looking at your socks; almost punch the air with excitement when you find a pair that (a) match and (b) are vaguely comfortable
11. Look at the empty wine bottles in the corner of your kitchen and think, “Oh, must deal with that at some point” before immediately forgetting about it
12. Take a sip of tea/coffee, realise it’s too hot and you won’t have time to drink it, and throw half of it out into the sink
It’s not you, tea. It’s me.
13. Discover you’ve somehow lost everything you need for the day — keys, money, Leap Card — and tear the house apart before finding that they were in your bag the whole time
14. Head out the door and realise halfway on the bus that you’ve forgotten to turn off the immersion
And, no, you don’t have breakfast.
Don’t be silly.
