THERE ARE SOME life struggles that only come knocking at your door if you abstain from all animal products.
We’re talking no meat, no dairy, no eggs – yep, this is hardcore. Of course, you’re in a lucky position in that you get to choose what you eat, but that said, there are definitely some niggles that come along with a restricted diet…
1. People assuming you always want to talk about your diet
Sometimes you just really, really don’t. You just want to eat a meal in peace, OK?
2. Literally not being able to eat anything in a restaurant
See also: charging you €16 for a few aul lettuce leaves and a cherry tomato.
3. Ending up comforting people because you can’t eat chocolate
When people find out you can’t eat chocolate, or ice cream, or cheese, or certain types of crisps, they react as though they themselves were being told they had to abstain.
4. Wedding food, conference food…
You know in advance to bring snacks and to eat beforehand, as set menus are rarely a friend of the vegan.
5. All the tiny things you never realised contained animal by-products
Marshmallows? Et tu, brute?
6. Always having to bring your own food to BBQs
But also secretly worrying that it’s kind of rude to do it. Sigh. Head-wrecking.
7. Absolutely baffling your extended family
Christmas can be, eh, a bit of an adjustment, let’s say. A pre-made nut loaf is the balm to a lot of vegan-related friction.
8. People asking if you’d eat your pet if you got stranded on a desert island
Er, no. Would you?!
9. Restaurants not even knowing what’s in their food
No, vegan doesn’t mean gluten-free, and nope, can’t have the fish either.
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10. Knowing that, on paper, you’re a nightmare dinner party guest
But you’re lovely. Honestly.
11. People asking you about protein
Plants have protein! For the last time!
12. Realising you might actually be becoming a stereotype
You’ve come to really enjoy making chia seed puddings and making your own almond milk. What’s next? Clothes out of hemp? Hmm, actually that doesn’t sound like an altogether terrible idea…
