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Dublin: 13 °C Wednesday 21 August, 2019
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ON TONIGHT’S GREAT Irish Bake Off the remaining bakers focused on chocolate, first via a signature bake and then a technical challenge.

It was a much smaller group after last week’s double elimination, and tensions were running high.  But did the best person go?

Tell us what you thought of the episode in the comments.

To recap, last week we lost Steve and Bridget. I wasn’t here to say it at the time, so I’m going to say it now.  THIS IS A TRAVESTY!

Ok, maybe it’s not technically a travesty.  Maybe it was the appropriate course of action, but it is an awful shame.  I’ll miss Bridget’s gasness the most, but also Steve’s calm demeanour.

Poor auld Maryanne really did have a shocker last week, didn’t she.  She clearly really cares about it, so I hope things go better for her this week.

Do you have a favourite at this stage?  I think it’s Stephen’s to lose really.

Chocolate cake is hard to get wrong, so these guys better do something impressive for the showstopper challenge.

Biddy basically said that she and Paul though Aoife would be great, but instead she’s been odd.  Nice.

I like Aoife, hopefully this week she’ll pull out all the stops.  Although she’s just said that she doesn’t really like chocolate cake, so maybe Biddy was write about her being a bit weird.

Stephen is a TV producer’s dream, right?  A rugby player who bakes?  AMAZING!  No one really expected him to be great either, and as Paul says he continues to impress.

Barbara has been coasting according to Biddy, and it’s kind of true that she’s flown under the radar.

She seems absolutely lovely though, and very little seems to faze her.

‘I hope Paul will be happy with my signature bake,’ says Jarek, ‘But you never know…with him.’

Was it just me or did Jarek sound ever so slightly murderous when he said that ‘… with him.’?

Wow! Will’s honeycomb looks amazing!  Now I want to make honeycomb. It’s so lovely and foamy looking.

Maryanne’s praline also looks delicious.  Maybe I should have said yes to my colleague Paul when he offered me cake a little while ago.

praline

Jesus Anna, don’t quit your day job.  Singing is not for you.

I’d say Sophie who gives the baking advice in the Kerrygold ads spends a lot on haircare.

Paul is doing his best to make baking a chocolate cake sound more treacherous than Indiana Jones’ journey to the Holy Grail.  I daresay there’s a glint of evil in his eye.

Sorry Paul, it’s true.

Oonagh is agonising over a plate.

A PLATE.

Square or circle?  HOW WILL SHE CHOOSE?!?

Somehow Maryanne has managed to get me totally on her side. The first few weeks I thought she was a bit of a teacher’s pet, but after last week’s meltdown I want her to do well.

Alas, she has forgotten her praline which she worked so hard to make!

Jarek is first up for judging and he’s feeling pretty confident.  He’s right too, because for once Paul is being nice… except for his suggestion that some orange with it would be nice.

‘I DON’T LIKE ORANGE,’ barks Jarek.  Brilliant.

Stephen flies it once again, but what of Barbara?  It looks great alright.

‘It’s so moist looking,’ says Paul.  I’M SAYING NOTHING, FRIENDS.

Will’s spiked his cake with Kahlua and it works.  Biddy and Paul approve.

Maryanne’s cake looks great, thank God. I’d be worried for her mental health otherwise.

The Great Irish Bake on TV3. Episode 5. Cake.

The judges like it too.

Annnnnd… they love Oonagh’s cake too.

Come on Paul and Biddy!  CRITICISE!  JUDGE!  That’s what you’re there for!  My kingdom for a harsh Paul Hollywood comment.

I mean, listen, clearly the cakes are all nice, but the judges just seem so easily pleased.  Surely not all of those cakes were of ultra high standard?

Surely a pastry chef at Paul’s level would have had some critical words?  Right?

The gang have to make a trio of desserts.  It actually sounds hard, and Maryanne looks absolutely HORRIFIED.

The lads are aghast.  Sure Aoife can’t even pronounce the words on the page, let alone understand the instructions.

Meanwhile, Paul is explaining to Biddy exactly how complex the recipes are, laughing maniacally all the while. (Alright, maybe that’s a bit of an exaggeration.)

‘You’re wicked,’ Biddy says, with a glint in her eye.

Maryanne is in a rage.  THIS ISN’T EVEN BAKING, she says to Anna, laughing maniacally. (This time I’m not exaggerating.)

It seems like the contestants are all very friendly, looking to each other for advice and help.

What the hell, guys?  This is a competition!  I want to see blood, dammit!

Aoife doesn’t seem to be taking things too seriously, and do you know what, I love her for it.  Who needs to prounce bah-va-oir (no idea) anyway?

In fairness to the lads, this does look quite tough. It needs to look perfect, and they are all freaking out about getting the layers in the glasses correctly, emptying, filling, piping, scooping, spooning.

‘Disaster,’ says Oonagh.

The trouble with this show only showing two challenges per week, is that the technical challenge drags a bit, doesn’t it?  It’s not that interesting to watch them all make the exact same thing and encounter the exact same challenges.

Because the technical challenge features alongside two challenges in the British version it moves along much more quickly.  Or maybe it’s just me?

Here’s Sophie again in the Kerrygold ad.  Seriously, you don’t get hair that long and blonde without taking good care of it.  I wonder what products she uses…

Here we go again, the lads are all struggling to get their chocolate bavarois (I googled it) exactly right.

The layers need to be the exact same size, and as you can see they are agonising over it.

The Great Irish Bake on TV3. Episode 5. Maryanne.

None of them have a notion about what they’re doing.  NOT A NOTION.

How can they not know what a tuile is? Seriously?  How can contestants on the Great Irish Bake Off not know that?

Anyone who’s watched GBBO should know that, let alone anyone who calls themselves a baker.

They’re finished now and they all look totally different.  Maybe this time the judges will actually say something critical!

Aoife’s tastes good, like Oreo cookie apparently!  What a compliment!  They’re as addictive as crack, you know.

Will’s bavarois is too set apparently, and the cookie like something you’d get in a garage according to Biddy.

Barbara’s cookies are like sponge apparently, Stephen’s cookies are sponge as well although his bavarois is nice.

Meanwhile, Maryanne seems to be back on form.  Her layers are even and she has even managed to do one actual quenelle.

Oonagh gets praise from the lads, her attempt at a tuile is the closest apparently.  And Jarek gets some nice comments too.

Maryanne is on the bottom, with Oonagh on top.  I haven’t a notion as to who will go.

Jarek is confident in what he did, actually his was the best.  Yes, according to Jarek his was the best. (He really has no time at all for Paul, does he?)

This week’s star baker is the woman Biddy called odd, that’s right, it’s Aoife!

AH HERE!  Jarek is going home!  That ain’t right!

Maryanne survives again despite coming bottom in the technical challenge.

This is all a little suspect.  What do you think?

Next week Biddy is looking for technical perfection, apparently but it looks like it’s going to be another comedy of errors.

I’ll be back then, in the meantime, have a great week and tell us what you thought in the comments!

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