Nothing makes you sack up and get over a hangover like a hotel breakfast you've already paid for.

— Lucy Wainwright (@Whoozley) September 18, 2016

Me at hotel front desk, looking for my wallet *pulls everything out of my purse that I stole from the room*

— livi (@lvgrz) September 16, 2016

had to jerk off half a dozen tiny hotel shampoo and conditioner bottles to wash my hair and frankly I'm exhausted

— molly (@MollySneed) June 8, 2016

Why is it people in hotel restaurants always look so suspicious and angry? You're getting free breakfast! This is the best day of your life!

— Colin Hoult (@colinhoult) February 25, 2013

There's a special place in hell for hotel room planners who place the toilet paper holder on the same wall as the toilet.

— Spencer Cecchini (@thespunta) September 4, 2016

The only bad thing about staying in a hotel room is memorising the new order of tv channels.

— Pankaj Ahuja (@panku_) September 11, 2016

Checks all drawers in hotel room 10x to make sure I don't forget anything.

Wonders on the way home if I checked all of the drawers.

— Dan Regan (@DanRegan_Comedy) May 19, 2016

Who are these people with enough confidence in their memory to actually put stuff in hotel room drawers?

— Lucent (@Lucent) May 4, 2016

Coco pops at the free hotel breakfast will always be a exciting to me.

— Hannah Mamalis (@Hantmam) July 9, 2016