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Dublin: 6 °C Monday 24 November, 2014

9 times Ireland was made a show of on Big Brother

We’ve only ourselves to blame.

LAST NIGHT BIG Brother returned to Channel 5 for it’s 14 (!) series.

The big twist is that an Irish man is among the group but is an actor who will be instructed how to act by the viewers.

We’re glad someone from Ireland is involved even if it’s a bit dodgy all the same.

But then Ireland has a rocky relationship with the show and for every moment of the likes of Brian Dowling winning there’s also moments where we as a nation have been made to look like a right pack of dopes.

1. Mary O’Leary aka Scary Mary

As Big Brother wore on they got more interested in out there characters than really nice people.

And even the Irish fell foul of this with the addition of Mary O’Leary in series 6.

Mary arrived in the Big Brother house like this because she was a witch y’see:

Yui Mok/PA Archive/Press Association Images

And she didn’t last very long, giving this rather terrifying pose on eviction night

Yui Mok/PA Archive/Press Association Images

Still she did have her fans in the Big Brother audience:

Yui Mok/PA Archive/Press Association Images

2. Noirin Kelly and her romantic dramas

Niall Carson/PA Archive/Press Association Images

Noirin Kelly was the undeniably gorgeous but somewhat grating Irish girl on the 2009’s series 10 of the show who said she was single when she entered the house.

She was still pining over her ex Issac who in a dramatic twist was brought into the house to reunite with Noirin.

You might think that this is sweet but given that Isaac seemed like a right dope it was just a big bag of morto:



BigBrotherUK / YouTube

3. Keeva Guilfoyle and her thing with Shabby

Doug Peters/Doug Peters/EMPICS Entertainment

Keeva represented Ireland in the final regular series of Big Brother on Channel 4 (and the last series most of us over here would have seen) and ended up having a friendship with openly gay housemate Shabby that always felt like it was going to be something more.

Shabby fancied Keeva even though she was straight and they constantly had to have awkward chats about it.



BigBrotherUK / YouTube

It was the very, very awkward moment when you don’t really fancy someone who fancies you loads played out to millions of viewers nightly.

Shudder.

4. Orlaith’s run in with Science

Mark Lees/PA Archive/Press Association Images

When Belfast model Orlaith McAllister was in the house the main problem the housemates had was not being able to say Orlaith properly.

Many of us were sat at home screaming “IT’S PRONOUNCED OR-LA NOT OOHLA YOU DOPES” night after night when she was introduced into the house halfway through series six in 2005.

Once she left the house she spent a good bit of time working as a Page 3 model but it was the confusion over her accent and this ridiculous fight with science that had Ireland cringing:



rwrrryan / YouTube

5. Tom and his way-ward boner

Toby Melville/PA Archive/Press Association Images

Big Brother was a tad more innocent when it first started in 2000 and the whole thing was passed off as a “social experiment”



Jarrod Daniel / YouTube

But there was national uproar when Tyrone farmer Tom gave Melanie a massage and the cameras caught his erection afterwards.

We can’t think of many things more embarrassing to happen to a man and it was quite the mortifying moment for Irish people on Big Brother.

6. Ray Shah relieving himself on the telly

Myung Jung Kim/PA Archive/Press Association Images

Ray Shah is now a successful broadcaster in Ireland but way back in 2003 he appeared on Big Brother’s infamous 4th series.

It was infamous for being one of the dullest years the show ever had and very little about that year made people sit up and take notice.

Leave it to the Irish person then to spice things up by blatantly going into the bathroom with the duvet over themselves for a quick hand shandy.

Ray, we’re scarlet even thinking about it.

7. Anna Nolan not winning the first series

Even though Big Brother clearly thought the idea of a lesbian ex-nun housemate would be controversial back in 2000, Irish girl Anna totally won over audiences.

She came across as cool and level-headed and it’s little surprise to see how well she’s done as a broadcaster here since.

We were still a bit mortified though when she didn’t win purely because the whole country thought we had it in the bag and we were going to show the rest the world that this was our new Eurovision, a TV contest we were made to win.

Sadly Anna was only a runner-up.

Ultimately she’s done the best out of the series one bunch but at the time we reckon she was miffed.

Sure look at her here:

Fiona Hanson/PA Archive/Press Association Images

Raging.

8. Brian Dowling acting the occasional dope

Brian Dowling has done incredibly well since Big Brother 2 in 2001.

Not only did he win the show he went on to work in telly consistently before hosting the show for two years on Channel 5.

Still, way back in 2001 Brian was a bit less mature than he is now and there were times when his acting the dope made us cringe a tad.

A good example is his trying to steal the show when another housemate tried to play guitar:



terribleetc / YouTube

9. Spiral in general

Ah jaysus.

We might have the odd morto from Brian and the likes of Scary Mary but in 2006 Sprial’s appearance in Big Brother 7 was probably the low point for Irish people on the show.

He would try and impress the ladies and made us all look very silly.

The crack he makes about a woman’s Blarney Stone here is a bit much



SpiralYeah / YouTube

Then there was his rap career which Big Brother found highly amusing:



frentique / YouTube

And then he managed to get a top ten single in Ireland with this tune:



xlynsey13x / YouTube

It’s amazing the nation ever recovered really.

So, remember DJ Spiral? He’s released a new single…>
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