THIS WEEKEND, COMEDIAN Richard Osman started the World Cup of Crisps, a comprehensive poll to name the Best Crisps.
The premise is simple: there are four crisps in each poll and the two that receive the most votes progress to the next round.
Our very own Tayto was in Group 4, facing off against Chipsticks, Walkers Smoky Bacon and Space Raiders — all vastly inferior crisps, we’re sure you’ll agree.
Mr. Tayto started a campaign to get the people of Ireland behind him…
And soon everyone was on board.
Meanwhile, some British people were utterly perplexed.
In the end, there was a draw for second place between Tayto Cheese & Onion and Walkers. *spits on the ground*
And so it went to penalties where Tayto lost by 2%.
Cue national devastation and uproar.
It was like Thierry Henry’s Handball 2.0
On this weekend of all weekends as well.
If ever there was a sign that democracy doesn’t work…
‘Tis a disgrace, Joe.
You know what you have to do, Ireland.
As for Tayto? They’re taking their loss well
Don’t worry, Mr. Tayto — you’re still the winner in our hearts.
We’ll be sure to have a crisp sandwich in your honour tonight.
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