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12 things only people who've worked in Boots will understand

“Please don’t ask me where the lube is, please don’t ask me where the lube is…”

1. First up, the uniform means people regularly mistook you for a nurse

Customer-Assistant Boots Boots

Not a nurse. Just your local deodorant peddler.

2. And it was the most impractical thing ever

White, when you’re cleaning up spilled foundation all day? Not a good idea.

3. You don’t know why people draw on the stands with makeup, and you never will

What are they getting out of it, other than upsetting the staff so very deeply?

4. You judged customers by the types of condoms they bought

What?! It gave you something fun to muse on during the long work day.

5. And yes, it’s awkward when customers ask you where the lube is

lNxW6 Popkey Popkey

You can’t just point and say “over there”. You have to personally escort them to the lube, and pray they don’t ask you for recommendations.

6. You can no longer listen to songs that were on the playlist when you worked there

Actual footage of you hearing Have A Holly Jolly Christmas outside work hours:

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7. Customers say they want their foundation colour-matched, but they don’t really

They’ll pick a foundation a million shades too dark anyway because they’re outraged at being told they’re pale.

8. Getting interrogated about when the Christmas Star Gifts would be on sale

People LOVE a good deal, but on no account were you to tell anyone when they could avail of it. Even your own mother couldn’t get it out of you.

9. And just Christmas in general

You just got a shiver down your spine remembering, didn’t you? That Christmas 3 for 2…

10. On the bright side, you get No7 products for half nothing

GIMME DEM VOUCHERS.

11. On the other hand, you spend 90% of your wages in the store

Good god, the DEALS.

12. But you certainly learned a lot about human life

BRITAIN BOOTS ALLIANCE UNICHEM AP / Press Association Images AP / Press Association Images / Press Association Images

Perhaps more than you needed to know, but… You’re grateful for that knowledge anyway.

Thanks to Leah Kieran for help with this article

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