STEP AWAY FROM the remote control. You may have been watching Home and Away just a little bit too long if you can identify with any of the below:
You remember how Marilyn used to be when everyone called her Maz
You can fondly recall Marilyn with her curly hair perched on the top of her head, sporting shorter hemlines, bigger earrings and higher stilettos as she wailed “Mr Fisher” in a high-pitched voice. She was also prone to ‘bad brain days’ and found life in the Bay ‘invigorskating’.
You actually miss Mr Fisher
You think Summer Bay High hasn’t been the same since the aforementioned ‘Flathead’ left the building. There was a man who knew how to discipline the teenage population of the town. Kids were afraid of him.
Sally was like an extra member of your family
You never liked goody-two-shoes Sally but still felt strangely bereft when she left the show. End of an era, you grew up together. (Good news though, she’s making a return to the Bay very soon).
You feel ready to accept any Summer Bay challenge
You’ve bragged to your friends at a table quiz that you know Romeo’s real name and the identity of Sally’s ‘imaginary friend’, should such questions arise. They sadly never do.
You remember the old Pippa and the old Roo
You dream back to the days of the old Pippa with affection, before remembering the sense of shame you felt when you eventually grew to love the new Pippa more. You were less offended by the introduction of new Roo. She didn’t just go to bed one night and wake up as a completely different person the next day.
You were heartbroken over Shane and Angel’s departure
You wanted to be in a couple that hit all the highs of Shane and Angel in their glory days. Strangely you actually liked both of their hairstyles immensely. They were ahead of their time with the floppy hair and hippy braids.
You still remember actors’ names from old show titles
You wonder what became of Rebekah Elmaloglou after all those years you spent pondering the correct pronunciation of her name while watching the credits roll. And you will almost certainly remember everyone featured in this titles sequence.
You can recall a less refined Alf
You long for the days when Alf Stewart called everyone a ‘sheila’ and used phrases like “stone the flamin’ crows” in every sentence he uttered, tough Alf, not the teddy bear he’s now become. You also remember when he had hair, all over his head.
You remember the show’s stars before they were stars
You remember a time when life was simpler for Dannii Minogue, Simon Baker, Isla Fisher and Chris Hemsworth before they became big Hollywood stars (or X Factor judges, as the case may be). You firmly believe that they would be nothing without Home and Away. Fact.
Bonus points if you are so overcome with nostalgia that you feel the need to watch that video more than once.
You own the Home and Away boardgame
No explanation necessary.