MAKE-UP IS GREAT. It can be used to cover up blemishes, a multitude of sins, and generally emphasis all of your good bits.
But jaysis it can be a pain. Here are eight dramas that make us wonder why we bother.
1. It’s such a time waster
Putting on make-up not only requires time, but also effort– something we are so not up for at 7am on a Monday morning. We mean, it’s literally a paint job on your face.
2. It requires skill and concentration
Just TRY applying make-up in the dark, or even without a mirror at the best of times. This means that in order to re-apply anything you’ve got to be at a mirror or take one out in public like the vain, self-centred princess you are. Nobody needs to see our mascara face.
3. It goes EVERYWHERE
Clothes, phone, basically anything you touch becomes a mess of beige residue once the foundation migrates from your face to your fingers. Not to mention the trail of lipstick you leave behind.
4. We have to take it off
Again, we’re not big on time wasting, or using industrial paint remover just before you go to bed. There are actual fumes that we’re inhaling all night, and we never get it all anyway.
5. It stops you doing things
Like crying salty tears, or any physical activity where you may sweat a lot. Rubbing your eyes is an absolute no no.
6. Smudges, everywhere
Lipgloss and lipstick in particular. The hazards you run into when looking for the shift are unspeakable. It’s either smudge central, or there’s a chance you’ll be glued together.
Look at it, it’s practically gelatinous.
7. Touch ups are necessary
MORE EFFORT. After a while your foundation will get a bit oily and people will soon be using your forehead to check their own make-up in.
Re-application is your only answer. Everything great that ever happens on a night out happens when you’re in the bathroom queuing for mirror space.
8. Frankly, it’s dangerous
Listen, you know the risks. A stray eyelash curlers will leave you lash-less and that mascara stick is just an eye injury waiting to happen. On a similarly aesthetic note– it seems we will not be content until we char ourselves away with a set of straighteners.
