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Dublin: 9 °C Thursday 25 April, 2024
water cooler moments

Look around your office... can you identify these 9 people?

The moaners, the talkers, the flirts, the dotes.

THE FINAL OF the US Office has aired in America and it’s with a heavy heart that we say goodbye to Jim, Pam, Dwight, Andy, Erin and the rest of the gang.

Surely there can’t be an office in the land with such a collection of misfits gathered into one small space, but we’re guessing some of them are up there.

Here are the nine people you might find in any office…

1. The know-it-all

Actually, I think you’ll find that’s a sans serif font.
Actually, it’s pronounced Valen-THIA and Bar-THELONA.
Actually, actually, actually….

2. The moaner

Oh my God my computer won’t work and I forgot my lunch and it’s too cold and oh now it’s too hot and I have a headache and everything and everyone is out to get me and I just want to go home. Everything is SO ANNOYING.

3. The noisy eater

The incessant chomping and slurping and lip smacking. Some believe it’s a valid motive for homicide.

4. The talker

It’s actually a really interesting story… it all started when I was 6 and my mother told me about my grandmother’s bunions. She started suffering from them when she was 11, but I’d really have to go back to when she was seven-and-a-half in 1946…

OH MY GOD. SHUT UP.

5. The flirty couple

You know who you are. The pair that are always hanging out at each other’s desks, playing practical jokes and sharing secret funnies.

On an office night out they’ll spend the whole night talking to each other, dropping the lámh when there have been too many sherries imbibed and disappearing mysteriously after Stay Another Day is played at the Christmas party.

Image: Shutterstock.com

When they get together it won’t ever be as exciting as it was when they were just flirting. Everyone knows that.

Except, of course, if they’re Jim and Pam…

Video: YouTube/Oats4Sparkle

6. The humourless shrew

Want to have an office beer at 4pm on a Friday when the boss has left early? Not if the shrew has anything to do with it…

Video: YouTube/KayBug142

7. The noisy typer

It’s such a problem that this actually exists: a keyboard sound muffler.

via CraziestGadgets.com

8. The person who makes you feel bad about your breakfast/lunch choices

Oh, you’re having a burrito, again? Do you want to put some of my chia seeds on it?

9. The dote

Of course, offices are also populated with lovely people, gas tickets, best friends, deadly bosses and dotes. After all, they’re probably the people you spend the most time with after your significant other/cat/dog/mammy.

Cherish them.

Video: YouTube/Berothebear

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