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Dublin: 3 °C Thursday 28 March, 2024
Gareth Fuller/PA Wire
Burn Rooney Burn

49-foot effigy of Wayne Rooney ready for Bonfire Night

No, that’s a real headline. Edenbridge Bonfire Society are planning a big night on Friday.

AN ENGLISH BONFIRE SOCIETY has unveiled an ambitious way to mark Guy Fawkes’ Night on November 5th: by burning a 49-feet-tall effigy of troubled Manchester United striker Wayne Rooney.

The massive model – complete with green, Shrek-style ears to mark the striker’s resemblance to the film ogre – was unveiled earlier today ahead of its official burning on Saturday at the society’s annual parade on Saturday.

The Rooney is dressed in full Manchester United strip, holding a bag of cash in one hand and a copy of the striker’s new five-year contract with the club in the other.

Society spokesman Charles Laver explained to the Daily Mirror that Rooney had been chosen as the subject of this year’s effigy having dominated newspaper headlines in recent months, beginning with his off-form performances at the World Cup and continuing through his indiscretions revealed by the same paper in September.

“I hate football myself so I’m quite happy to burn a footballer,” Laver said. “One of our members is a big Man U fan, so he’s been advising us on getting all the details of the kit just right.”

The paper reports that previous Bonfire Night effigies have included Russell Brand, glamour model Katie Price, Cherie Blair and Gordon Brown.