TOMORROW IS DECEMBER 1: time for kids to open the first door and squabble over the chocolate.
But why should young people get all the fun? Here are the advent calendars for YOU.
1. Whiskey advent calendar
A shot of whiskey behind each door. And a different whiskey, at that. Probably put it out of view if you have a Christmas party.
2. Beer advent calendar
Twenty-four different 330ml bottles of beer, just waiting to be sampled. (Not sure how you manage without putting it in the fridge, though.)
3. Bog roll advent calendar
Excellent idea. Although it does limit your household to sharing one square of toilet roll per day.
4. Smutty advent calendar
Each door conceals “chocolate bums, boobs and willies” according to the description. If that’s your thing.
5. Tools advent calendar
No, not more chocolate willies. These are actual tools. Give this to someone, and then lay a massive guilt trip on them if they haven’t built you something deadly by Christmas Day.
6. Jelly Belly advent calendar
A different flavour behind each window. Let’s be real: Jelly Bellys are the greatest, and are totally wasted on children.
7. Tequila advent calendar
Because nothing says Christmas like slammers.
8. Ludicrously posh advent calendar
Retailing exclusively at Harrods, this Wedgwood-manufactured advent house costs a tasty £9,600 (reduced from £12,000!). Each door contains a porcelain ornament. Basically, it’s just waiting for the dog to knock it over.
9. … and the DIY advent calendar
Done.
