SO YOU’VE MADE the decision to bring a bag of cans to your mate’s for a chill one.
But what beer to choose?
PLEASE NOTE: The criteria here is that they be budget beers in cans, available from all good supermarkets. No ciders or fancy craft bottle fare.
16. Obscure Lidl or Aldi, or own brand beer
Keep these to have away from company. We won’t tell anyone.
15. Carlsberg
Does anyone who isn’t your uncle actually drink this in Ireland?
14. Grolsch
Who do you even think you are? Go to a pub.
13. Bavaria
Scaldy. So scaldy. Have some self respect.
12. Bud Light
Would you G’WAY. You’re uninvited to cans.
11. Carling
Unless you’re at a British music festival and this is your absolute only option, it’s not acceptable.
10. Tuborg
This sounds like a toy an eight-year-old boy would want. Avoid.
9. Fosters
We’re getting into acceptable territory now, but it’s still bound to get you a few looks.
Cheap though, which is always a positive.
8. Budweiser
Acceptable, easy to palette and largely inoffensive to all involved.
7. Coors Light
Don’t be put off by the ‘light’. It’s refreshing and looks a bit sophisticated. Look, there’s a mountain on it for God’s sake. Nature.
6. Dutch Gold
SERIOUS bag of cans fare here. It’s cheap, expected, and it goes with field drinking like beige food goes with a hangover.
5. Warka
This Polish delight is unusual enough to maybe fool some people into thinking it’s posh, but it’s really really not. Put it in your flimsy bag today.
4. Zywiec
Yet again, the Polish prove they make the best cheap beer known to man. It doesn’t taste awful either.
3. Stella Artois
Have some sense, act like you’re cultured, go for the Stella. They look a bit cheap but you can constantly pronounce it in a Belgian accent.
Stella Ar-twah.
2. Miller
Nobody ever says anything bad about Miller, because it does the job and isn’t too challenging. You can even go for the light if it’s a nice day to up the refreshing factor.
1. Heineken
A cliche, but it’s the perfect bag of cans beer. Fight us at your peril.
