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11 essential phrases to bluff your way through the Six Nations

Here’s the comprehensive guide to bumbling your way through Ireland matches over the next couple of months.

AH, THE 6 Nations. The yearly sporting event where Ireland have a legitimate chance of actually winning and where everyone gets a little frantic for 7 weeks in February and March.

But, what about those that don’t follow rugby all that closely but will be in the pub when everyone is shouting? So, here are a few useful quotes to blag your way through watching the boys in green:

1. “Ah, if only BOD was out there”

Brian O Driscoll Freedom Of The City. Sam Boal Sam Boal

Last year BOD retired from the game and will not be gracing us with his presence again. Ever. If Ireland aren’t doing all that well, throw this line out there and it will be greeted with a knowing sigh.

2. “Sure it’s the Tullow Tank”

Sean O'Brien Billy Stickland / INPHO Billy Stickland / INPHO / INPHO

If you hear somebody shouting about the Tullow Tank, they mean the Irish player Sean O’Brien and not some sort of oil-based shenanigans. The fact that he is one of Ireland’s best players, is from Tullow, Carlow and is indeed a “tank” are the main reasons this name has been bestowed upon the man.

Just roll with it and start shouting it when he gets the ball.

3. “Yeah, we’re quite good, but I’m not expecting much”

Irishfans memecenter memecenter

Ireland might be favourites this year, but no true Irish fan shouts it from the roof tops - we play down our chances and never get ahead of ourselves.

4. “Paul O’Connell is SOME man”


A cult hero in Ireland, any positive thing you can say about O’Connell will be warmly received by all. An absolute must in a rowdy pub setting.

5. “George Hook doesn’t know what he’s on about”


George Hook is the main man on the RTÉ rugby coverage. Some people really like his opinions on the game, others really don’t. This line will stand you in good stead throughout the tournament.

Ronan O’Gara joined the panel last year and excelled with his tie selection – which is always worth a comment.

6. “Joe always gets it right, doesn’t he?”

National Enterprise Week Sam Boal / Photocall Ireland Sam Boal / Photocall Ireland / Photocall Ireland

The Ireland coach Joe Schmidt has a serious reputation for getting the gameplan just right. If Ireland are winning, wield this line and you’re set up for some enthusiastic nods of agreement. 

7. “Ireland have to keep their discipline”

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If Ireland are losing or in a close match, this line is a perfect catch-all for their on-field tactics. Use it liberally.

8. “Rob Kearney is solid under the high ball”

kearney-electric Thejournal Thejournal

Said any time Rob Kearney catches the ball.

9. “The lineout is just… malfunctioning”

tumblr_lesewbCi2J1qaqaiy Tumblr Tumblr

Any time O’Connell doesn’t catch the ball from a lineout, just claim it’s malfunctioning and “needs to be sorted.”

10. “It’ll always be Lansdowne Road to me”

The Aviva Stadium - Lansdowne Road, Dublin infomatique infomatique

Show your true rugby credentials by dismissing the new Aviva Stadium name, and calling it by the original Lansdowne Road moniker. The kudos will come rolling in.

11. “Yer man Zebo has some skills”

ZEBO-VOLLEY Mocksession Mocksession

Ireland winger Simon Zebo is the designated “most skillful” player on the team. Use this knowledge to your advantage.

So, there you are now. Go forth and support vocally.

More Paddy Power are offering ‘odds’ on BOD’s new baby playing rugby for Ireland>

More Ireland fan cracks up entire stadium with rugby sign>

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