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Dublin: 14 °C Tuesday 3 October, 2023
# Cough Cough
11 real life struggles of calling in sick
It’s not a relaxing day at all.

IT’S FRIDAY.

It may as well be called national calling in sick day, such is its popularity on the last day of the week.

But it’s not easy by any stretch:

1. You’ll wake up at about 3am with an overpowering feeling of some poxy illness

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2. That you’ll spend about half an hour passing off as ”just a bit tired” until you realise you are in denial

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3. The torture of STILL having to get up early to make the awkward phone call into work

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Even though you have decided you are sick, the world doesn’t know.

4. Worrying that you don’t sound sick enough on the phone so you feel the need to sell it

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5. By over exaggerating all symptoms in a way that sound believable

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6. The general guilt overcomes you even when you are DYING

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It’s inevitable.

7. Although if you’re pulling a sickie, you can’t leave the house under any circumstances

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Somebody, somewhere would see you cruising around the shops with not a bother on you.

8. Even when you are sick, leaving the house is fraught with danger

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“I’M GOING TO THE PHARMACY, LOOK”

*holds up medication for world to see while walking*

9. You feel an overwhelming urge to have your mam around and maybe a hot water bottle too – even though you’re an adult now

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10. You realise that those plans you have made for the evening are totally and utterly ruined now

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Ruined by lies. You can’t be seen out sipping pints.

This sick day has truly become a burden.

11. And lastly, your coworkers know well when you stroll back into work like nothing has happened

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The head on you.

They’re giving you the death stare but that’s OK. You’ve had your sick day.

More 26 things you’ll only find funny if you’re Irish>

More 10 reasons why Irish men are truly the best>

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