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Dublin: 12 °C Monday 3 August, 2020

The most annoying car park users in the world

Are you one of these people? ARE YOU?

AH, THOSE PEOPLE you curse at in the car park. Where do they come from?

Nobody knows. But we have prepared this painstaking field guide to the world’s most annoying car park users.

Needless to say, the genders are completely arbitrary.

1. Mr ‘Don’t Fence Me In, Daddio’

Lines? Lines mean nothing to me.


2. Ms Millimetre

Parked expertly, except that the car is 5mm away from your driver’s door/front bumper/wheel arch and there is no WAY you’re getting out.


3. Mr Diagonal



4. Ms ‘Ghost Parker’

Not a bad parker as such, but deeply frustrating when your heart leaps at a free space… only to find a diminutive vehicle tucked away in it.


5. Mr Inappropriately Large Vehicle

Also known as Mr Inadequate Manhood.


6. Ms Long Term Parking

Really? You’re in the space outside my house for two weeks? Did you go on holiday or something?


7. Mr Just For A Minute

Hazards on, car locked, blocking six spaces and a lane of traffic for two hours.


8. Ms Random Placement

Can you even… see… the parking spaces?


9. Mr and Ms Revenge Is Sweet

Responding to somebody else’s bad parking with their own, thus creating total chaos.



Please share your own pet car-park peeves in the comments…

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About the author:

Michael Freeman

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