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Dublin: 20 °C Friday 21 June, 2024
1990s living

8 things anyone who has lived in a Celtic Tiger apartment will understand

Storage heaters and paper-thin walls.

1. Walls approximately the thickness of origami paper

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2. The utter impossibility of controlling these heaters

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What do all the dials do? Here’s the thing: NOBODY KNOWS.

3. Having to keep your mop and bucket in the corridor

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Because there is literally no space for it. Or anything else.

4. The mysterious nationwide shortage of hooks to hang things on

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So you have to get those plastic ones that go over the top of the door.

5. The unique feel of plastic leather furniture

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Every. Single. Thing. I mean, come on. Do you need to wipe the sofa down that often?

6. Suffering the tyranny of the immersion heater

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Could we not get a little central heating in here? Or at least a timer? No, of course we couldn’t.

7. Trying to cook in a kitchen the size of the average cat bed

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I’ll just put this pan here… and this one here… and this plate of vegetables in the sink…

8. And finally, the joy of finding mysterious stains left by previous tenants

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And you KNOW the things that have happened on your mattress. You try not to think about them, but you KNOW.

What have we missed? Share your apartment fails in the comments…

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And a €6,000-a-month apartment rental on Grafton Street>

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