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Dublin: 7 °C Wednesday 12 December, 2018

Organic wine, yoga and steamed veggies -- this couple's 'clean' wedding is the actual worst

No beef or salmon here.

👰 #steingoldwedding

A post shared by Jessica Sepel - JSHealth (@jshealth) on

WEDDINGS ARE TRADITIONALLY filled with too much prosecco, beef or salmon, and the requisite dirty fry the following morning.

Jessica Sepel, an Australian nutritionist, decided to forego all of the above and have a “clean” wedding.

And it seems like it was quite… something.

First of all, there was no breakfast buffet.

Daily Mail Australia reports that guests were invited to have… sugar-free bliss ball and banana-date-walnut muffins for breakfast.

What’s a sugar-free bliss ball when it’s at home? They’re essentially balls comprised of nuts, oats, cacao powder, coconut, and various other powders.

But what about the morning after croissants?!? Everyone know they’re the best part of any wedding.

There was no horsing into prosecco.

Instead Sepel enjoyed a glass of organic wine, because of course she did.

I don’t usually drink, but I did enjoy a glass or two of certified organic Australian Chardonnay from Organic One. There are no chemicals used in the manufacturing process which means your body is better able to break down all the alcohol and you’re not left with a hangover

Imagine spending all that money on the hotel and not even getting a glass of bubbles out of it.


Did we mention that guests were invited to do yoga?

Imagine trying to coax loads of Irish people into doing yoga at your wedding.

This morning .....! #yoga #steingoldwedding

A post shared by Jessica Sepel - JSHealth (@jshealth) on

Beef and salmon were most certainly not on the menu.

Instead, the dinner consisted of “Thai green papaya salad, roasted brussel sprouts and grilled local snow white fish”.

Rather chillingly, Daily Mail Australia also mentions that guests were served “steamed veggies” AKA the most miserable food on the planet.

But they did have brownies for dessert! Just kidding — Daily Mail Australia reports that they had… fresh fruit.

giphy Source: Giphy

There was also a juice station.

Where guests could knock back shots of “Red Pepper-Tomato Tonic” and “Kale-Cucumber”.

Sounds… fun.

- “Did you hear John had three shots of the carrot-apple booster?”

- “The mad bastard.”

giphy (3) Source: Giphy

Sepel says the aim of the wedding was to prove that weddings don’t need to be indulgent, boozy affairs.

Often people feel that weddings must be indulgent and extravagant – but I hope that having a ‘healthy’ wedding shows people that healthy living can be so simple, even in such a busy and celebratory time.

Whatever you say, Jessica. Whatever you say.

This Mayo clothes shop sure knows how to pull in the customers >

Carrie Fisher brilliantly shut down body shamers who said she hadn’t aged well >

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About the author:

Amy O'Connor

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