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Dublin: 18 °C Saturday 18 May, 2024
a spit away

9 distances that would make no sense to anyone outside Ireland

No GPS here.

1. A spit away

When Irish eyes were smiling Liamfm . Liamfm .

Translation: it’s actually pretty far but we’re trying to play the distance down to make it sound closer.

2.  Two parishes over

Church View Mark J Devine Mark J Devine

Tourist: “Please, kilometres will do.”

3. Down the way

Sloperton, Monkstown - Dun Laoghaire (Ireland) infomatique infomatique

4. A country mile

driving in rural ireland dennis dennis

Response: “I will accept the directions in regular miles as well.”

5. Beyont

Athlone Town - Ireland infomatique infomatique

Translation: Undefined area in another direction, but a very specific distance away.

6. Past the gap

Irish Country Road Neil Tackaberry Neil Tackaberry

You’ll know it when you see it. “From here to the gap” is a definitive distance that should be understood by all.

7. As wide as a gate

irish countryside Neil Tackaberry Neil Tackaberry

A standard gate, as defined by physics.

8. Just a shtone’s throw away

Meadowlands Neil Tackaberry Neil Tackaberry

Tourist: “Again, I will accept miles because I’m walking it.”

9. Only around the corner

On a distant Irish Road Accidental Hedonist Accidental Hedonist

Taking that distance at face value is a recipe for disaster.

They’re poor crayturs if they’re overhearing any these directions, really.

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