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off the drink

The 9 types of people doing Dry January this year

We’ve got your number.

MOST OF THOSE who overdid it during December are probably telling everyone who’ll listen that they’re doing Dry January.

A whole 31 days without alcohol. That doesn’t sound so bad? If you’re doing it, you’re one of these…

1. The one who has already broken it

But they’re back on it NOW, so you can’t say anything to them.

2. The one who refuses all social invitations for the fear of breaking it

They’d rather stay in with a cup of tea and a movie than be tempted by you cretins.

3. The one that gives themselves three days grace

In MY rules, you have three days off in Dry January for special social occasions etc.

That’s not a thing.

4. The person who seshed too hard

This person is literally doing Dry January because they overdid it partying in December and have no other choice. The smell of beer makes them ill.

5. The one that keeps looking at people who are drinking disapprovingly

Y’know that’s really bad for your liver.

6. The health nut

“I’m doing it for health reasons, not as some silly little competition. Here, have a water”.

7. The reluctant participant

They were talked into it by their friends, family, or partner, and now they have no one to go drinking with.

8. The joker

‘I’m doing Dry January. Here, watch me drink this dry white!’ You’re only gas.

* sips green tea*


9. The detoxer

This person believed they were detoxing their body until they read that Dry January might be bad for you. What to believe?

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