Dublin: 7 °C Sunday 26 March, 2023
# please no more
10 eating habits that need to be stopped
Crimes against food.

EVERYONE IS FREE to eat delicious food however they please, we all know this.

But there are some crimes against food that deserve to be judged hard by the general public. Like:

1. Eating a Kit Kat without breaking it in half

Or even worse, going for a full bite on a four bar Kit Kat monster:

kitkat Twitter Twitter

It’s not a Snickers. Kit Kats are designed to break apart for your convenience. Throwing it all in there in one go is a tyranny on chocolate.

2. Cutting a pizza in square slices

What fresh hell is this? The triangle cutting technique is proven over time – it makes the slices easier to pick up and gives everyone an equal share.

Some people just want to watch the world burn.

3. Putting sauce all over chips instead of dipping them

Sure, personal choice and all that. But you’re ruining the texture of the chips as well as denying a nibble to anyone else. That might be part of your plan though, you geniuses.

4. Deliberately opening a packet of crisps upside down

crisps Twitter Twitter

This might actually help with flavour, but the aesthetic appeal of the crisps has been lost forever.

5. Eating a full orange like an apple

The orange segements are perfectly designed to pick off. What are you DOING?

6. Eating a burger with a knife and fork

Exceptions can, of course, be made for those monstrously big burgers. But other than that, the two buns of the burger are the perfect burger handles. Please, use them.

7. Eating a kiwi with the skin still on

kiwi Imgur Imgur

Real life people are out there right now doing this.


8. Mixing all the food together into one unidentified paste

381463955_a0dead8dd4 Flickr Flickr

Potatoes, meat, vegetables and beans – all mixed together to create a sort of orange sludge.

9. Nibbling all the chocolate off a bar

crucnhie Twitter Twitter

Leaving one soggy, depressing sliver of a middle.

10. Adding tomato ketchup to pizza

Two completely different tomato-flavoured sauces – in one pizza. How is this travesty allowed? The final insult.

Do you or any of your friends indulge in such crimes? Do you feel the need to stick up for these practices? Let us know in the comments. 

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