1. Having a good ol’ gossip sesh
“Do you know Maria Murphy?”
“No, but that doesn’t matter, please continue.”
“WELL…”
2. Watching The Late Late Show… even if it’s just to slag it
Fact: no person has ever willingly admitted to watching The Late Late Show and yet hundreds of thousands of people watch it every week.
3. Getting emotionally invested in Eurovision
We know it’s futile, but we can’t help but think “This might be our year!” whenever Eurovision rolls around.
And when we don’t do well? “It’s all political anyway…”
4. Keeping up with this couple’s romantic exploits
Oh, you love it.
5. Jedward
Sure, they might be very hyper, but they’re one of us. Or two of us. Whatever, you get the picture.
6. Not being generous when you buy crisps in the pub and not giving a damn
ALL FOR ME.
*horses into crisps*
7. Sneakily tuning into Winning Streak
Even if it’s just to make comments about how “your man looks like he still has his communion money”.
8. Going to Copper’s
You always say you won’t go there and then 2am arrives…
9. Watching American films set in Ireland just so you can scoff at them
Pffft, Circle of Friends.
*cancels plan and stays in to watch it*
10. Good old-fashioned begrudgery
Ah, that most Irish of pursuits.
Once someone gets even a tiny bit successful, we’ll always be there to take them down a peg and call them a “pox” behind their backs.
11. Celebrating Paddy’s Day
March 16th: “Ugh, I hate Paddy’s Day. It’s such a nightmare, ugh.”
March 17th: “LOW LIE THE FIELDS OF ATHENRY…”
