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Dublin: 5 °C Thursday 24 January, 2019

People are freaking out that Super Mario has nipples for some reason

Where do we go from here?

IT’S BEEN A big month of one of the Mario brothers. Specifically, Mario.

For starters, he’s been put out of a job – a plumbing one at least.

A new bio on Nintendo’s Japanese site reads:

All around sporty, whether it’s tennis or baseball, soccer or car racing, Mario does everything cool. As a matter of fact, he also seems to have worked as a plumber a long time ago…”

This update does not specify what Mario’s current profession is, simply that he is no longer a plumber.

Career break – good shout M.

He’s also just turned 32.

Super Mario was released in Japan on September 13th 1985. HBD.

giphy (6)

And now we’ve learned that he does, in fact, have nipples.

There he is. Frolicking.

Seemingly, people were unhappy about this newfound information.

It was *a lot* for people to take in.

Get those dungarees back on ASAP.

Others were … Suprisingly thrilled.

People questioned the lack of chest hair.

Not much of an Italian stallion after all?

Actually, maybe we spoke too soon.

Cannot unsee.

And don’t get people started about that suspicious bellybutton.

But, like everything, there’s always room for improvement.

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