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Dublin: 13 °C Friday 19 July, 2019

10 celebrity Wikipedias that will make you feel like a total peasant

Us mere mortals can’t compete.

1. Damian Lewis’ ancestors include a former Lord Mayor of London, a Lord and a ‘philantrophist’ (code for rich person)

Very relatable.

damianlewis Source: Wikipedia

Damian Lewis opens the London Stock Exchange Source: PA Archive/PA Images

2. Not only is Rooney Mara an Academy Award-nominated actress, but she’s also NFL royalty

How many sports teams do your Mam and Dad own?

rooeny Source: Wikipedia

2016 TIFF - Lion Press Conference Source: AP/Press Association Images

3. Eddie Redmayne went to school with Prince William and his great-grandfather was a Sir

Well, lah-di-dah.

eddie Source: Wikipedia

Investitures at Windsor Castle Source: Steve Parsons

4. Julia Louis-Dreyfus’ great-great-grandfather founded a ludicrously successful commodities and shipping conglomerate back in the nineteenth century

During the six-month period ending June 30th, 2016, the Louis Dreyfus Group had net sales of $23.5 billion.

What did your great-great-grandfather do, eh?

sg Source: Wikipedia

AOL BUILD Speaker Series: Wednesday, April 20, 2016 Source: AP/Press Association Images

5. How you know Benedict Cumberbatch is posh:

  • His father is named Timothy Carlton Congdon Cumberbatch.
  • His grandfather has his own Wikipedia.
  • The phrase “high society” is mentioned.
  • His great-grandfather literally knew Queen Victoria.

cum Source: Wikipedia

Doctor Strange Portrait Session Source: Chris Pizzello

6. Meanwhile, Miranda Hart is so posh that the ‘early life’ section of her Wikipedia is actually just a 400-word synopsis of her family tree

Don’t you just hate when you’re descended from barons, marquesses, earls and dukes, and have to spend the rest of your life resenting coming from an aristocratic background?

hart Source: Wikipedia

Some choice quotes from Hart’s Wikipedia that put into perspective just how posh she is.

Sir Percival Hart Dyke, 5th Baronet. It’s no “Paddy McCarthy,” is it?

Hart’s patrilineal great-great-great-great-grandfather was Sir Percival Hart Dyke, 5th Baronet (1767–1846).

“Both the Culme-Seymours were implicated in the Mylius affair.” Two people with double-barrelled names being caught up in a highfalutin society scandal. Friends, it doesn’t get any more upper class.

His wife, Miranda’s great-grandmother, was Mary Elizabeth Culme-Seymour, daughter of Sir Michael Culme-Seymour, 3rd Baronet, Vice-Admiral of the United Kingdom (1901–20). Both the Culme-Seymours were implicated in the Mylius affair.

But of course.

Hart is a fourth cousin, twice removed, of Diana, Princess of Wales.

Spy European premiere - London Source: Doug Peters

7. Brooke Shields’ ancestors all sound like characters from The Princess Diaries

Ah yes, the Grimaldis.

fg Source: Wikipedia

Exorcist on Stage Source: AP/Press Association Images

8. Imagine Ralph Fiennes’ family reunions :O

Lots of continental kisses and jumpers wrapped around shoulders, we imagine.

ralp Source: Wikipedia

Italy Film Festival The English Patient Red Carpet Source: Andrew Medichini

9. Helena Bonham Carter: so posh that her family tree has its very own Wikipedia 

Helena doesn’t even need to go on Who Do You Think You Are? She knows exactly who she is. It’s all on Wikipedia.

helsn Source: Wikipedia

The Moet British Independent Film Awards Source: Jonathan Short

10. Landowners, botanists, major generals, Normans – Tilda Swinton is like something from Game of Thrones

Us mere mortals can’t compete.

gh Source: amy

LA Premiere of Doctor Strange - Arrivals Source: AP/Press Association Images

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About the author:

Amy O'Connor

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