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Dublin: 12 °C Friday 22 February, 2019
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10 reasons why applying liquid eyeliner is a giant pain in the hoop

*takes a deep breath*

M1G601 Source: Mac Cosmetics

LIQUID EYELINER.

A perilous pen like no other.

On the one hand, you could look like this…

liquideyeliner Source: Katrina Maree/YouTube

One wrong move, however, and you could wind up resembling this.

Pw3d0P9 Source: Imgur

It’s a process that requires precision, accuracy and real skill.

For that reason, it’s a road paved with peril and danger.

1. First of all, you’re pretty sure that little pen in front of you can smell fear

*blesses self and says a quick prayer before going for it*

2. But you have to act cool–never let liquid eyeliner know you fear it

cool Source: Reaction Gifs

You will either end up looking like Audrey Hepburn or Frankenstein.

There is no in between, but that is a risk you have to take.

3. Before you even start, you know that it will probably, no definitely, be uneven

Why do I even BOTHER?

4. The possibility of getting it in your eyeball is very real

Causing your actual eyeball to turn black and murky like you’re an extra from The Walking Dead.

5. Trying to put it on when you’re rushing out the door in five minutes is completely futile

CLEAR MY SCHEDULE FOR THE AFTERNOON

- you, applying liquid eyeliner

6. Applying it in a moving vehicle is a fool’s errand

Unless you’re going for the A Clockwork Orange look, that is.

7. You will probably spend time trying to watch YouTube tutorials about how to perfect the skill…

sellotape Source: YouTube

Wait, is that sellotape?

You don’t have bloody time for sellotape.

*turns it off*

8. And so, the struggle continues in vain

9. Curse your unsteady hands!

One twitch and it’s everywhere.

You begin to think that perhaps only actual painters can apply liquid eyeliner.

10. Until one day, you actually kind of nail it and realise that you can now accomplish anything

TIME TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD.

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About the author:

Amy O'Connor

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