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Dublin: 9 °C Wednesday 19 February, 2020
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12 essential rules that all pedestrians NEED to adhere to

From your fellow pedestrians to you.

1. First things first: don’t stop in the middle of the footpath for a chat with an acquaintance

At least have the decency to move to the side and clear it for passersby. Seriously, don’t make people step off the footpath just so you can talk about Sinead’s baby’s christening.

giphy (6) Source: cindysuen/Tumblr

2. Don’t walk and text unless it’s an absolute emergency

Particularly on a busy street where people are in a rush and collisions are inevitable. Either put the phone away or, if you desperately need to send a text, nip into a shop.

And if you’re one of those people who taps your phone screen with your index finger, don’t even attempt to do it while in transit.

16 - 1 Source: Google Plus

3. For goodness sake, don’t walk around a narrow street with an enormous Irish Nationwide umbrella

These umbrellas are great in theory, but they’re much too big and unwieldy to walk around a town or city. Honestly, just buy a small, sensible one from Penney’s. You’re going to lose it anyway and at least you won’t take someone’s eye out with it.

um Source: Flickr

4. If you’re walking two abreast, please keep an eye on who’s coming behind you

And don’t start inexplicably veering towards the edge of the path at the exact moment someone’s trying to get past you.

fag Source: Flickr

5. And if you’re walking three abreast, you straight up need to stop

Ahem, Spanish exchange students.

6. Idly strolling along in the middle of a busy street is not on

Would you drive at 20mph on a motorway? Of course not. So let’s keep up the pace while we’re walking down Grafton Street, shall we?

8. On the flipside, neither is absolutely pegging it like you’re Rob Heffernan

giphy (4) Source: Giphy

9. Let’s cool it with the hand-holding, shall we?

Holding hands is lovely, but please don’t be that couple who forces people to navigate around their two-person human chain.

giphy (1) Source: Giphy

10. Ditto with romantic farewells in the middle of the footpath

THEY’RE ONLY GETTING ON THE BUS! No need for a Casablanca-style shift sesh in the middle of the footpath.

giphy (2) Source: Giphy

11. Taking out a giant map in the middle of a footpath is never okay

We know you’re lost, but aking up the whole corner of the street so you can consult your enormous ordnance survey map is not on. Ever. Just ask someone for directions.

maf Source: Flickr

12. Finally, if a buggy is coming through, just be sound and step off the goddamn footpath

For everyone’s sake.

giphy (5) Source: Giphy

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About the author:

Amy O'Connor

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