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Dublin: 11 °C Wednesday 8 July, 2020
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10 truths every shift worker will eventually learn

It’s a tough life.

TODAY WE FOUND out that shift workers are more likely to be fat. Boo.

Being a shift worker is tough enough as it is…

1. Lunches must be carefully planned in advance

What to get for lunch at 8pm on a Thursday that isn’t battered and fried…? Slim pickings, that’s what.

But hey, you can often get the discounted items in Tesco when the time is right.

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Get in.

2. You can go days without seeing anyone outside of work

Those late shifts are lonely work.

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3. Getting up to be productive before a late shift is a myth

BUT, think of all those off peak appointments you could make if you wanted to.

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4. No one else knows of the bliss of being off while everyone is in work

The world:

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You:

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It’s ALMOST enough to make up for the horror of being in work when everyone is off.

Almost.

5. All construction work on your road will begin as you settle into bed on a Monday morning

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6. A late shift followed by an early shift feels like you never went home

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7. Your television choices when you get home are pretty bleak

Great. You totally wanted to watch a Charmed marathon followed by some Shortland Street and Jeremy Kyle. Maybe a bit of teleshopping if you’re lucky.

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8. There is no such thing as plans

You’re a slave to that roster, and you don’t find out about it until the week before.

But hey, it can sometimes get you out of stuff you don’t want to do.

9. Weekends do not exist

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10. You have to plan your boozing to a tee

You’ll miss the off licence by a mile, so you’ll have to get it pre-shift. It’s OK, buying a bottle of vodka at 11am on a Tuesday looks totally fine.

As for joining nights out after your shift? Prepare for nobody to remember you were even there.

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The 10 emotional stages of working at the weekend>

11 people who definitely won’t be getting a good reference from their former bosses>

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