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13 things people with babies do

You! Holding the child! We’re talking to you!

AH, THE MIRACLE of life.  It’s really something isn’t it?

One day you’re just a human being, enjoying your life, and the next you are in charge of the safety and wellbeing of a whole other person.

Obviously, an experience like that changes a person.  Suddenly your priorities are different, your lifestyle is different, and you can be damned sure your behaviours are different.

Here are 13 things people with babies do.

Arrive into town at 9am sharp and desperately wait for the shops to open because you just HAD TO GET OUT OF THE HOUSE


Look at the clock after being up for five hours and think ‘How is it only 10AM???’


Feel guilty about putting nothing but photos of your kid on facebook but you really just can’t help it because they’re so DAMNED CUTE


Realise you’ve been wearing the same outfit for four days and that there is a massive baby puke stain on it that you hadn’t even noticed


Hold entire conversations with yourself in baby talk without even realising you were doing it


Pounce on the first adult to arrive into your house and beg them for news of the outside world


Think wistfully about the days when you had time on your own

Knowing all the while that you wouldn’t swap your situation for anything.

Flickr/Chewy Chua

Get really excited about going out but then once you’re there find all you can think about is going home to the baby


Go into the baby several times while they’re sleeping to ‘check if they’re ok’ but mainly just to look at them


Spend a significant portion of each day arguing with yourself over which bit of them is your current fave

Flickr/Giulia Bartra

Make a real effort to talk about things other than your baby but find it a real struggle

Flickr/Tampa Band Photos

Wonder why you occasionally have the desire to bite them because they’re so cute and squidgey

Flickr/Evil Erin

Worry uncontrollably about something bad happening to them


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