IT’S ALMOST HALLOWEEN, so we are giving scaring the beejesus out of you a go.
1. This arrives on your doorstep
WHAT DO THEY WANT NOW?
2. Spotting this up ahead
Was that a flash? Christ, I’m got.
3. Approaching one of these to ask for solpadeine
4. When this flashes up on your screen
And the subsequent voicemail of doom.
5. Or even worse, waking up to THIS on a Saturday morning
Did you say you’d go over? AH SHITE.
6. Driving past a field and seeing these
Rain, rain.
7. Opening the door and spotting a kid with one of these
Are they lying? Is it legit? Where are their parents? How much can you give?
8. The back of the bus
We do not talk about the back of the bus.
9. The sound of sirens when you’re in traffic
WHERE IS IT?
10. When it’s coming towards the end of the night and this is the situation
Do you buy another round? What if everyone wants to go home?
11. Wondering what fate lies ahead when faced with this
Delicious chocolates… or a sewing kit?
12. Not buying something in a fancy shop
You changed your mind about wanting something but the shop assistant is staring at you. How do you escape?
13. When people get on a busy bus but you’ve a seat to yourself
Don’tsitbesidemedon’tsitbesideme.
But they will. They will.
