Dublin: 16 °C Tuesday 28 May, 2024

The 8 maddening stages of trying (and failing) to get U2 tickets

“Your wait time is less than 33 minutes.”

U2 In Concert - Los Angeles AP / Press Association Images AP / Press Association Images / Press Association Images

THIS MORNING, TICKETS for U2′s dates in Dublin and Belfast went on sale.

It was a trying experience for all involved.

First, you were greeted with a list of options as long as your arm.


Music Generation Zone? VIP Travel Package? Official Platinum Tickets?

None of these words make any sense to me! I just want a normal, reasonably-priced ticket. Not a gold-encrusted ticket that grants me the opportunity to touch The Edge’s foot or whatever.

After completing a random captcha code — “Amazing Atmosphere” and “Baby Blues” were the ones we filled out — you were directed to this ominous holding page…


Processing… high demand… patience.

They might as well just say, “HAHA, NOT A CHANCE, LOVE.”

And once that was “processed”, you were met with this.


“33 minutes. I can do this,” you think to yourself. “I just have to sit perfectly still and make sure I don’t refresh the page. I’ll just look at those circles go round and round and round. Maybe I’ll use the time to meditate!”

Two minutes later…


Until finally it looked as though there was light at the end of the tunnel!


Four minutes, baby!

*opening strains of Where The Streets Have No Name plays faintly in the distance*

Only for your dreams to then be crushed



giphy (12) Reddit Reddit

You can’t fathom how on Earth these people managed to procure the fabled tickets.


Sorcery? Bribery? How??????

But sure, maybe you can get a ticket from a third party seller, right?

viagogo Viagogo Viagogo

Or maybe not!

Ah well, there’s always next time.

Have fun, guys.

giphy (13) Giphy Giphy

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