1. The thought of a day doing nothing except watching a box set makes you genuinely excited
2. You have avoided a social engagement to stay in and watch something
3. At least once, you have woken up early specifically to watch the latest episode
7.00am:
7.04am:
4. You’ve had this thought
5. And this one
6. You have accidentally drooled on at least one sofa cushion during a binge
7. You have cheated on your loved one with a box set
By which we mean, watching ahead while they’re out/on the phone to their mam/have gone to bed. AKA ‘Netflix Adultery’.
AAKA the worst crime you can commit.
8. You have had that moment where you get up from the couch, and have to shake food out of the folds of your clothes
During:
After:
9. This sometimes feels like a genuine possibility
10. You tell yourself you could stop at any time
11. When it’s all over, you feel confusion, shame and regret
But only at having to re-enter the real world.*
More: 9 lies you’ve already told yourself today>
More: Turns out a lot of people binge-watched House of Cards last weekend>
* No, that isn’t an actual person in distress. It’s from American Horror Story. Which you should binge-watch!
