HERE AT DailyEdge.ie we know what matters.
So we’ve painstakingly ranked all the varieties of Irish breakfast cereals*, from worst to best.
This ranking is final and definitive.
*By ‘Irish breakfast cereals’, we mean the ones available in Ireland, past and present. By ‘all’, we mean some of the main ones.
20. All Bran
Dusty matchsticks. That’s what All Bran is.
19. Original Shredded Wheat
Tastes like steel wool. And you shouldn’t need a knife and fork to eat your breakfast cereal.
18. Lucky Charms
You can now buy these for approximately €427 in selected food emporiums in Ireland. Don’t bother.
Unless you have this kind of patience:
17. Fruit and Fibre
A satisfactory alternative to muesli, and thanks to Ross Kemp we’ll always remember that it contains:
Apples, hazelnuts, bananas, raisins, coconut, sultanas…
16. Special K
Eating Special K actually makes you LOSE weight, at least that’s what they want you to believe.
A pleasant enough malty taste, and strangely moreish.
15. Country Store
By Country Store we really mean all muesli, but this particular brand gets a special mention owing to its exceptionally pleasing packaging. We’re a fickle bunch.
14. Porridge
You either love it or you hate it. You might take it with milk, or balk at the idea, preferring the more austere water method. Adding fruit is an option, or maybe honey. Perhaps brown sugar is your bag. Listen, what you do in the privacy of your own kitchen is up to you.
13. Shreddies
Commonly known in Ireland as a “blow in” cereal with slight notions, Shreddies are nonetheless a reasonable choice. A fine variety of flavours, and a grand big box.
12. Sugar Puffs
There’s only so much sugar one can take, and Sugar Puffs step over the line.
It’s really nostalgia that helps them onto this list. Who didn’t want the Honey Monster to turn up at the breakfast table/football match/birthday party? We love you Honey Monster.
11. Weetabix
There’s no messing with Weetabix. What you see is what you get. We’re hot milk people here at DailyEdge.ie Towers, but if cold milk floats your boat, that’s okay too.
10. Frosties
Essentially just cornflakes with the sugar already added. However, there is something about the shiny glaze that elevates Frosties. And anything with a mascot as enduring as Tony the Tiger has to be on to a good thing.
9. Cheerios
You could pour yourself a bowl of Cheerios as big as a house, and still it would never be enough. Such a pleasant texture, with just enough give once the milk has been added.
The original variety can be a little bland, leaving them at number nine.
8. Bran Flakes
An underrated classic, but perceived to be “too good for you” to rank any higher.
A word of warning: there are people in this world who put sugar on Bran Flakes. These people want to watch the world burn.
7. Corn pops
Ah the elusive Corn Pop. A disgusting concept (originally marketed as tasting like popcorn, and who wants to eat milky popcorn) marvellously executed.
Unfortunately these are no longer available in Ireland so make friends with someone who’s going to America soon.
There are claims that Kelloggs Honey Pops are a suitable replacement. We are not convinced.
6. Weetos
These crispy chocolate hoops will assault the roof of your mouth, but they are worth it. Man alive are they worth it.
5. Rice Krispies
In at number five is the humble puffed rice. Not only are Rice Krispies the basis for the world’s best party food (shout out to Rice Krispie buns), they also have an elegant simplicity.
4. Crunchy Nut Cornflakes
Despite smelling ever so faintly of wet dog, there’s a reason the ads for Crunchy Nut Cornflakes depict people frantically scrambling for more.
Their sheer addictiveness garners them the number four slot.
3. Cornflakes
You don’t mess with a classic, and it doesn’t get much more classic than cornflakes. Welcome to number three cornflakes.
2. Start
Irish people love Start. We feel a kinship to it. We don’t know if it’s because it makes us feel athletic, or because you can only get about three bowls out of the box so it must be special.
Either way, it’s delicious, and deserves its number two slot.
1. Coco Pops
Ah the humble Coco Pop. The daddy of all horrifyingly sweet and chocolatey cereals.
Coco Pops give so much, and expect nothing in return. Even a small box yields plenty of bowls. Every spoonful is delicious and at the end you have the reward of a chocolatey milky lake.
Even their difficult Choco Kirspies phase was top notch.
Congrats Coco Pops, you cheeky monkey.
