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Dublin: 6 °C Thursday 28 March, 2024
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16 ways childhood TV ruined your life

Why WAS it called The Cosby Show?

1. The Cosbys confusion

The family in The Cosby Show were called the Huxtables, so why the blazes was it called The Cosby Show?

Sure, the guy in it was called Bill Cosby, but what did that have to do with the Huxtables? Hours of childhood confusion.

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2. The Animaniacs Song

The number one way to be the envy of your friends was to complete the fiendishly impossible task of learning all the lyrics to the Animaniacs theme tune.

Which you never could, of course.

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3. The Animaniacs smut

And then, of course, there was this:

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4. Once Upon a Time, Life

This French cartoon taught us everything there was to know about the workings of the human body.

Hands up if the thought of all those spaceships and baddies roaming around your bloodstream and innards gave you the heebie jeebies.

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Not to mention the icky sex bits.

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5. Bosco terror

Was the use of instrumental strings in the Faherty ‘sketches’ intended to induce fear and terror into the hearts and minds of Irish children? Because it worked.

And the way Faherty floated around? Shudder.

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And what about that deranged purple crow Cornelius? Looked like he might peck your eyes out.

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6. Zoo expectations

When Bosco wasn’t horrifying us with Faherty, he was giving us unrealistic zoo expectations.

Bosco got to go through the Magic Door and hobnob with zookeepers and amazing animals. We.. er.. didn’t.

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7. Sit Boo Boo, sit, good dog

That time when you realised the dog was called “Ubu”, not “BooBoo”.

Yes, we know it was written right there. Hindsight is a wondrous thing.

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8. Family Ties

Remember Andy Keaton, the cute little kid who joined the Family Ties gang in later series?

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This was him in 2009:

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Meanwhile, there was the problem of how the dodgy-looking paint job at the start of the opening credits turned into the masterpiece at the end.

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Sha la la la.

9. Kevin and Winnie forever

In The Wonder Years Kevin and Winnie never ended up together. In the final episode they did get back together, but we were eventually told that that Winnie eventually moved to France and Kevin married another woman.

Hold us.

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10. Paul/Marilyn Manson

As if the Kevin and Winnie treachery wasn’t bad enough, remember all those times you smugly informed friends that Paul from The Wonder Years went on to become Marilyn Manson, only to be informed that you were WRONG?!

Josh Saviano (who played Paul) spoke out about the rumour last year, saying he has no idea how it started.

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In fact Saviano is now a corporate attorney and recently had a little reunion with Jason Hervey (who played demon brother Wayne).

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11. Rimini Riddle

Probably the most terrifying children’s TV programme ever to grace television screens. We still have nightmares.

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12. Tone it down Mona!

Who’s The Boss was the greatest. It had Tony Danza, a fantastic theme tune, and that lovely romance between Tony and Angela.

But then there was Mona the granny. Always ruining things with her confusing innuendos and double entendres.

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13. The terrifying old lady puppet from Pajo’s Junkbox

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Look at her. LOOK AT HER!

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14. Never having enough big boxes to make your own Pajo’s Junkbox

It was the eighties. Large appliances like washing machines. tumble dryers and dishwashers weren’t common purchases so when a box that big did come your way, boy oh boy did you go to town on it.

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15. How Do You Do with Mary Fitzgerald

Mary Fitzgerald was sent to torment the children of Ireland by making wonderful things out of ice pop sticks, pipe cleaners and crepe paper… none of which anyone had lying around their house.

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16. The Girl from Tomorrow

It was a harsh realisation the day it dawned on you you were never going to be as cool as Alana or have a transducer.

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Read: Things you’ll ONLY understand if you grew up with Irish TV>

Pajo, Fortycoats, Kevo… 13 things that should be on RTÉ’s new kids’ channel> 

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