Dublin: 13 °C Tuesday 26 September, 2023
David Miliband: not a zombie. Photo: PA
# The Living Dead
David Miliband is "anti-zombie"
The UK’s Shadow Foreign Secretary sets the record straight on Labour’s policy towards the undead.

DAVID MILIBAND has revealed the British Labour party is anti-zombie.

The man who has been flagged as the next leader of Labour made his position clear in an interview on the “Labour Uncut” website.

Between going over the finer points of rehabilitation for repeat offenders and equal marriage rights for homosexual couples, Miliband tackled the questions that really needed answering:

Have you seen the film Shaun of the Dead?

A. No…

Q. Do you know anything about the film, Shaun of the Dead?

A. A small amount. I’m not a zombie!

Q. Tell me what you know about the film.

A. I know it’s got a lot of zombies in it.

Q. It’s about killing zombies.

A. We don’t like zombies. We’re anti-zombie.